Miscarriage and Cookie

Oooook. Most of you reading this know that i have the IUD. It's great! I have had maybe 3 or 4 very light periods since Wyatt was conceived.

I started my period on Friday, I still have it today! What the hell! I NEVER have my period longer than 4 days. NEVER. Well, yesterday I began bleeding really heavy and last night/this morning I was experiencing awful pain! I also passed some blood clots.

I found out that it wasn't blood clots. It was the beginnings of my baby. I was pregnant.

Since the IUD was in, my body attacked the baby and killed it.

Wow.

I have been craving baby for a while now and all I had to do was take the damn IUD out. I even had an appointment to do it 8 weeks ago.

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Kayla is better without getting pregnant. Do you have any idea what I would have to do to even CARRY a baby? All my sane meds (because they don't MAKE me crazy) would have to vamos. How much do you wanna bet that my poor kids would not be too thrilled with that?

Well.

I got pregnant anyways.

Had I known I was pregnant before my IUD began to create a hostile environment I would have immediately taken it out and even quit my meds. *sigh*

Now I have so many happy things going on in my life in the next few weeks. I don't foresee any alone and down time for me to just....I don't know. Just be.

So that was my SAD news. I have HAPPY news now.

We got a boxer today! She is 8 weeks old and her name is Cookie. Thats one of the only things Wyatt can say clear enough. That I would even consider naming a dog I should add.

She is so docile and is very well mannered.

She's not related to me. LOL



I think my sad news still outweighs my happy news. With everything going on in my life right now, I don't need a baby. But it sure would have been nice to be pregnant again... So for now, I have Kane && Wyatt && Cookie.

Slacking....

Well, I can't say slack because I have never updated on a regular basis. But I can say I am sporadic at best, neglectful at worst.

I have a TON of things to do! Here is just a small list of all the things I am doing the rest of this year!

Putting together a Halloween party for the Branch.
Hosting a party at my home for a friend.
Having Wyatt's birthday party, here.
Putting together a Christmas party for the Branch.
Having a friend stay with us for a little while.

Now, honestly that doesn't sound like a whole lot. Add on to that AVON, school (three classes this time, not just two) holidays, holiday parties we have to attend and my regular, daily, almost non-existent, maidly duties around this house.

I say non-existent because anyone that knows me, knows that I hate to clean. Seriously hate it. I don't know many that enjoy it, but I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I hate it. I would rather gnaw a fence and have wild dogs chase me then clean, on some days. There are a few days that you might actually catch me doing some type of cleaning duties around here. They don't come very often, but if you time it just right, its there. :)

I am taking Anatomy and Physiology I, Software Applications and Career Development Strategies for this term. So far, I am not behind! My grades are in the upper 90% and I like my teachers. The two latter classes are easier compared to my A&P class, which is why I requested to take the third one now as opposed to when I am taking Medical Transcription II and Pharmacology.

I sometimes wonder, why in the world did I mess my whole academic life up by dropping out of school. Seriously. If you don't know why I dropped out, I will tell you. In 8th grade, I missed a couple days because I did not feel well. That's normal, right?

Well, since I missed a couple days, I got behind in school. Not a lot behind. But I got my first B. I know that sounds ridiculous. But I hadn't gotten a B before. Not joking either.

So I freaked out and my logic was, if I don't go back, I won't feel like I am a failure because my grade doesn't reflect my intelligence if I am not there to earn it!

So my mom passed me onto 9th grade. I promised to do better. I promised I would not screw up this time. Then I don't remember what happened, but I missed a few days (in March) and I got behind again.

I got a C on a paper, and my warped logic kicked in.

I dropped out again.

Then I figured if I switched schools, I wouldn't have to be around all of those classmates that wondered why I had to retake some 9th grade classes.

I got through a few months, got depressed, attempted suicide, then dropped out of school because I was so far behind, I would have to graduate a year later than I was supposed to.

That has been my mantra with school.

Go for 1 full term. Do great! Then the second term comes along, I do horrible because I don't give it all of my attention and then I drop out.

I have done that many many many times. This time, I am in my third term!

WOOHOO!

So I have not lost focused and I cannot lose focus. I need to do this not only for me, but for all mah boys (all 3 of them).

I know some people who don't want better for their kids. It makes me sad to see the things they do with their precious ones. It makes me sad that they aren't striving to make their children's lives better then theirs.

That's my rant and rave for the day.

Teri told me to put pics up. Because she likes my pics.

So these are for you Teri. :D

Kane being CHEESY outside.


























Wyatt needing his hat for protection from the horrible slide!

Wyatt, Kane and Ana'Li jamming out with my pots, pans and Tupperware.

I promise Wyatt doesn't walk around with no pants on all the time. This is him helping me make flour tortillas. They were DEEEEELISH!

Kane making flour tortillas now. His were much flatter. LOL